The Air Jones Flight Experience
A Message
to
Our Obese
Customers
See that seat?
That's what the seats on our planes look like.
Can your ass fit in that?
Be honest.
Didn't think so.
If you want to fly with that middle arm up so your ass can spill onto two seats, then you're going to have to pay for both of them.
Got a problem with that?
Maybe you should skip the buffet this trip.
Really Need, Anyway?
When travelling, you typically only need a couple of shirts, some undies and a book, right?
That all fits in one bag, right?
Here at Air Jones, we generously allow our passengers to bring one carry-on bag FREE of charge.
If you need to bring another suitcase -which makes the plane weigh more, which burns more fuel, which hurts our bottom line- then we're going to charge you $30.
If you selfishly bring TWO more suitcases, then it'll cost you $55.
EACH WAY.
NOW are you reconsidering what you "really need?"
A La FUN
We keep the cost of you AJ ticket down by offering many of your amenities and services A La Carte.
So feel free to ask our flight attendants for anything.
For a price.
PRICE SCHEDULE:
water $5
soft drink $8
peanuts/pretzels $5
sandwich $9
headphones $12
pillow rental $8
sick bag $8
restroom one-time $7
restroom flight-pass $11
